We have been psyching ourselves for some days now to take the leap. I think I am almost into it now, on a kind of ‘just do it’ slogan. For once I could make my parents happy. In the past year or so they haven’t failed to let me know they believe my inability to integrate has a great deal to do with me. Especially a particular quality of mine. It is now the day to remove this obstacle.
I may fear that even though they think such, they may be wrong. My immediate reaction to particular cultural strands of this locality has always determined my interaction with figures of the establishment and even general interaction. I can’t go on. I cannot say it yet. at this stage it isn’t final and my psyching still requires work.
On Tuesday Liliom was given a new role in the big ballet performance. Last week when she presented us her part she immediately commanded our respect and amusement and realised that our child whom we often accuse of a lack of concentration is capable to an amazing level of it. The fact that she has been chosen to learn a new part only a handful of sessions before the show actually highlights how wrong we were. Her teacher apparently trusts her most to be able to pull it off. I guess we usually expect her to maintain focus and attention like a regular grown up, but we don’t spend time with other young ones her age to realise that she is perhaps a rather focused person.
However, in the mornings she puts all this to question. For ten months now every morning we have the exact same weekday morning routine. Yet, she still needs constant reminders on the next step in the great task of getting ready. Of course, probably far as she is concerned this constant nagging is part of the routine too.
Ernest is a different case. He decided that the appropriate time to get up is a minimum of 90 minutes before the alarm would suggest so. He has taken on to serenade us. The other day he just sat at the end of the bed singing away. When having enough of that he started taking out various instruments and played us music of all kinds. My favourite was the ukulele. Is the ukulele. He plays a song and he sings along giving himself a round of applause after each song. It has become a new hobby of his.
We have started planning our route to the far north. For a long time we only had the 2 stops in Hungary, Budapest to say our good byes and Aggtelek in the north east where I promised Liliom some pretty caves. Now we have some vague and some pretty solid ideas for the days we are en route to Oulu. With Jen however we had an argument last night about the starting moment of the journey. She claimed it starts once we leave Budapest considering that is where the final packing and readying will take place. I claimed however that it will start when we drive away from Szeged on the grounds that that is when our flat is given up and we are only stopping at Budapest to meet up with some folk (my parents) and to take part in Budapest Pride.
Another day has passed. I was going to finish the circle of this entry last night but haven’t gotten to it.
Maybe I haven’t mentioned before that we have been having some issues of infestation. The kind that goes on at school, but doesn’t stay at school. We were completely oblivious to this problem until one morning discovered in Ernest. Finally, after hours of thorough examination I have become a suspected carrier too.
Last night after all the psyching the process of making my parents happy begun. I thought it wasn’t going to take long but Jen was determined to save me some strength. Sampson’s legend was strong in our minds. After five hours I have become a new man. It is amazing how much dirt one can live with so close to his skin for such length of time. I don’t feel any more integrated, and at our local shop I have had a conversation of regret (the shop assistant though it was regretful to be more ‘integrated looking’). I am thankful for Jen for keeping me some strength to carry on.
The truth is, some time ago I have said, aacually when I started the new blog in Hungarian of life in Oulu, that I already feel gone. Testing Sampson’s legend was a planned event for July, when we are already in Oulu. It is life’s sweet twist to bring events forward. Shall I feel I am gone from Szeged; it is time than to act accordingly. It is a new beginning. You shall not be fooled by this blog’s name, Szeged, is history